Phew, what a day! I am exhausted after staying up with Aliss all night, and then talking her through the last 7 hours of the birth.
It was a long slow birth, with the first 12 hours only pushing Afonso back into place, not down, and her cervix only opening 6cm.
At that point Aliss had been up for 26 hours, and was exhausted. “I cant do this Dad”, “can’t you just take him out somehow?”. Pacing up and down with the contractions, which were actually very short and far between, but still it seemed like too much for my little girl.
“OK, listen, I said. Every time you tense up you are slowing down the baby. Concentrate on your breathing, not the pain. Use me, hug me, break my fingers if you need to. Do whatever you need to do to allow these contractions to work. Put yourself in whatever position works best. But we are gonna get this baby out of you, and you are gonna help.”
From that point on I didnt leave her. Every contraction had her screaming, but with Henrique her partner and baby’s father on one side, and me on the other, continually talking her through the contractions, telling her how strong she is, how beautiful, helping her to stay as calm as she could, telling her what is happening and that its all normal, after some long long hours she started to feel like she needed a poo, and now it was time to stop the breathing exercises, and start pushing properly.
From time to time Antonio the midwife (thank you Antonio for everything) would check the baby’s heart rate - all perfect every time, its seems Afonso wasnt in any hurry to come out, and had no idea of the stress going on around him.
Finally Aliss is sat on the birthing stool, pushing down with all her might. Dad beside her willing her one final burst of energy, me on the other doing the same. Strangely Aliss seemed to lose contractions here, and just a feeling of needing to push every few minutes. The head was showing, but it still took over an hour, with Antonio helping to guide Afonso’s massive head out, and the 3 of us all screaming together as Aliss pushed.
And then he was here. All in a rush, baby in arms, placenta to follow, and all that pain and effort was miraculously forgotten about. Smiles and relief all round - we did it!
What a miracle childbirth is. I’ve attended the three births of my children, but none were such work as this the birth of my grandson.
And then he is wrapped up. A very happy and relieved mum and dad, with their brand new little one.
And later on I get my chance to give my little grandson a cuddle. Exhausted from talking Aliss through the labour, but very very happy that we did it, and Aliss didn’t go to hospital, where I think she would have lost control of the situation. Anyone who didn’t know Aliss may well of believed her when she screamed she couldn’t do it anymore. But we all knew she didnt want any interventions, and that just with a bit of calm, support and love this birth could and would just happen here.
All of our gratitude goes out to Antonio the midwife, for being here, for staying hands-off and letting us get on with it, and for listening to me whan I explained that Aliss is prone to over react and doesnt mean it when she screams for an epidural. And finally for stepping in at the end and doing all the midwife stuff, including a few stitches that were needed. I would thoroughly recommend Antonio as midwife to anyone giving birth in central portugal.
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